Unrequited (Chosen #3) Read online

  UNREQUITED

  Book Three

  The Chosen Series

  By Alisa Mullen

  This book is a work of fiction and all persons appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real people, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

  Copyright © 2014 Alisa Mullen

  All rights reserved.

  ISBN-10: 1499527055

  ISBN-13: 978-1499527056

  The Chosen People Page

  Alexandra Lied, Vanessa Lofton,

  and Rachael Berkebile

  I admire my beautiful assistants - Krysta Anderson and Marina Acosta! You saved me from pulling out all my hair.

  A standing ovation to my street team full of babes!

  Melissa Cheslog, Jessica Gomez, Sarah Ratliff, Laurie Schmidt Lee, Carrie Klein, Jennifer Finch, Dawn Duhamel-Stanton, Donkey, Tracey Parker, Anne Milne, Stephanie Gresham, Cindi Ann Delaney Bebout, and Malinda D. Spriggs.

  Thank you Kim Black, Nina Ceves, Jeanne Mullen,

  and Mailliw Sdlonyer

  For those who can’t find their way back

  ONE - NICK

  I sat at The Crimson Club in Allston, Massachusetts. It was a laid back bar with tall cherry wooden stools, matching high circular tables, and a tinted red glow that graced the place with a sense of stylish warmth. The Crimson Club was a special place for Boston tonight because my fiancé would be performing on their stage. This would be her second public gig and I was excited for her. For us. For Conner.

  Lizzie had hesitantly agreed to accompany Conner’s band mates, formally known as The O’Malley Band. She was the honorary O’Malley that would sing the first set in honor of her late brother. Conner would have been twenty-seven years old and it had been a pretty bumpy day for us so far.

  Lizzie’s father, Patrick, claimed that he wanted to come but her mother, Claire, still wouldn’t leave the house. Patrick regrettably declined Lizzie’s invitation. She knew the score with her mother’s mental state after Conner died but I saw the heart break in Lizzie’s eyes as they drifted over the crowd. She needed them to be here to support her and the band. She had cried this morning and said she wished they would come if only to honor the day of Conner’s birth.

  Despite tonight’s solemn but celebratory theme, The Crimson Club had solid memories for us and our relationship’s evolution. I watched Lizzie sing for the first time here and her stage presence blew the air right out of my chest. She got jealous about my date before we were together and utterly ignored me at this bar. That night pissed me off. I broke it off with the girl that same night.

  Most importantly, I proposed to Lizzie here at The Crimson Club in front of our parents and all the patrons that night. I sang her favorite song, “Butterfly Girl”, got down on one knee, and professed my love for her. That was a great memory but what was even more amazing was we made love for the first time that night. That was the best sexual experience I’ve ever had. Our bodies were synced in a way that is impossible to describe. I have tried many times to vocalize my love for Lizzie but it’s just… unachievable. Words fall short and never do it justice. Nonetheless, I still try.

  Tonight, her voice cracks as she welcomes the crowd. She is nervous but is trying hard not to show it. I am so damn proud of her for getting up on that stage. Because we are newly pregnant, she is up there without a lick of alcohol in her system. Lizzie needed a lot of shots of whiskey to perform the last time she was here. She is stone cold sober and hormonal. I am pretty sure that is why I am sitting way back here.

  “Thank you,” she began with a small smile. Her hair was highlighted fluorescent pink from the lights over the stage. She was wearing a Boston College tee shirt and a pair of green cargo pants. She had makeup on and Lizzie never wears makeup. I mentioned that at the house and she complained that her morning sickness was making her look pale. So up on stage, she looked like a whole new girl…a hippy, rock star, if that is a valid label. She wore three leather bracelets on. She recently had them custom made through a shop in Faneuil Hall downtown. One read, “Niall”, our son. One read “Conner”, her departed brother, and the last one read, “Nick”, the luckiest bastard this side of the universe.

  Lizzie continued her introduction. “Today would have been my big brother Conner’s birthday but he was recently killed in a car accident.” She swallowed a few times and then the tightness in her voice became obvious.

  “He was an amazing musician and he taught me everything I know. Conner, if you can hear me, I am sorry for the song I am about to sing. I know you hated it but I wouldn’t be your annoying sister if I didn’t play what I want tonight.”

  People chuckled and she faintly smiled out to the crowd.

  As she started to strum, I recognized the melody of “I Will Remember You” by Sarah McLachlan. I leaned back against the chair and released a slow steady breath. I had heard her sing this song more than once but the accompaniment of the band and the acoustics of the bar were powerful.

  The bar went silent. The bartenders came to a complete stop and as if this was a eulogy at a funeral, people bowed their heads in honor of Conner. Everyone’s eyes were either glued shut, tearing up, or fixated with reverie on Lizzie.

  I am older than most people who have fallen in love for the first time. I am nearing thirty years old. Other then my parent’s marriage, I thought that true passionate love was a bunch of horse shit. In the past twelve years, I’ve had girlfriends and trysts that resulted in passionate women stalking me. They claimed they had fallen in love with me somewhere between when my tongue assaulted their mouth and when I pulled off the condom. I tried to be nice about letting them down easy but it got shady a few times. They knew how much money I had. If they became my girlfriend, well… they would indulge in the wealthy side of life. I tended to seriously date women for more than two weeks who were in the same social class as me so I knew they weren’t just after my money. It didn’t matter. They still expected diamonds and forever.

  Besides Lizzie, I was infatuated with one other woman in my life. I was twenty-one years old. I stalked this beautiful brunette named Macy who was a pleasure to talk to and was unreal in bed. I found out days after she didn’t answer my calls that she was married. I’ll never forget the male voice that came on the other end who told me to find someone else’s wife to stick it to. That was a wakeup call to start asking women their marital status before I bedded them.

  I will be the first to say that love at first sight doesn’t exist. Lust at first sight? Yes. “I want to be your friend” at first sight? Yes. But love? No way. With Lizzie, it was both lust and friendship combined that made me pause. That had never happened before. I lusted after her and I wanted to be her best friend immediately. That didn’t make sense.

  I didn’t realize I fell so hard for Lizzie because she was so frigging stubborn and all over the place that I was more frustrated with her than anything else. I thought other women would replace the need I had for her. No one could replace Lizzie and she reminds me of that every day.

  That is also another misconception about your soul mate. It isn’t someone that you are just so enamored with that love just pours down like rain all around you. A soul mate is someone that makes you feel love, anger, sadness, excitement, frustration, inspiration, and desire.

  The person I adore the most is the biggest pain the ass that has ever lived. She is selfish but loyal. She is loud but amusing. She picks her feet and flicks the toe junk at my face if I tell her she acting like she is twelve. I fell in love with Elizabeth O’Malley, red head, freckles, a Masshole, and Red Sox lover (someone please help me now). When the Rangers play the Red Sox on television, we really don’t like one another very much and our whole building probably knows it. It’s good. We are soli
d.

  She is my other half, my best friend, my inspiration, and my lover. Lizzie is the type of girl that keeps me guessing day after day. She is a wild ride in and out of the bedroom. Despite the very conservative life with extreme social standards I grew up in, I feel right at home in the presence of her spunk. She came into our friendship with her baby boy, Niall, from another relationship but that didn’t matter to me…much. Sure, I wished he was my blood but he is a perfect kid. He came from Lizzie’s body and I adored him before I even met him.

  So now, I am that guy. I am smitten, in deep, whipped, a drooling dog wanting a bone, and a goner. I am her fiancé and saying that makes my heart skip a beat. I jump out of bed every morning with a spring in my step knowing that she is going to be my wife and she is carrying my child.

  When she told me she was pregnant, she did it in the most amazing punked moment in my life. I still think about that day and chuckle. She doesn’t let the opportunities to laugh and make fun of life go by. I have never known anyone that enchants me on every level. She wrecks me when we kiss, when we banter, and even when we cuddle on the couch while we watch baseball.

  Her strength and her vulnerability are equally her sexiest characteristics. Sometimes I want to eat her whole but I haven’t figured out how. My life would be shit devoid of her. I am not even certain how I lived my life prior to meeting her. Perhaps I was just going through the motions waiting for the divine intervention. Thanks to the Gods. I assure you that I will never ever let my girl go.

  TWO - NICK

  Lizzie’s singing voice was raw. She sang strong and firm reaching from the deepest areas of her gut. When she closed her eyes, I know she has vanished into her music. I am always mesmerized by the way her face changed from contemplation to contentment in the span of three minutes. She became the song. As she sang about not letting life pass by, her eyes wandered up to the lights, her voice hit a particularly high note, and I noticed she was trying not to let the tears fall. She personifies the word passion.

  One time, when we were writing a song together at home, I noticed her detachment and stopped playing my guitar. I wondered if she even realized that I was still in the room. She did a double take at me when she finished the song only to see me staring at her.

  “Where did you go?” I asked.

  She shrugged her shoulders. “I think I go into the ache. It’s like the core of energy and it’s bigger than me,” she replied and then hiccupped a laugh. “Wow, I sound like a hardcore new age tree hugger.” I rolled my eyes at her because she was just that

  As the band finished up their first song tonight, she wiped a tear from her cheek and serenely smiled out to the boisterous crowd. Everyone was on their feet and applauding. I envisioned Bostonians listening to this thunderous crowd from two blocks away. She looked across the room and met my eyes. She blew me a kiss and she and I locked gazes as we paused a moment, taking in the applause. I could see the love and pride she had in the moment. Lizzie belonged on stage. Her fire red hair, green eyes, and soulful voice paid her dues into the musicians club for life.

  Lizzie was not only passionate on stage but with everything that she put her mind and heart to. She is a brilliant mother to her son, she is a compassionate daughter to her grieving parents, she is my kick ass fiancée, and she is very successful at her job. Despite the fact that I accumulated more than enough money to secure our family line’s financial welfare, she wants to work, and prove herself. She told me that one day. I am not sure to whom she was referring to so I didn’t say anything.

  Relationships are ironic that way. We never really know everything there is to know about someone. We love them with everything we have but life’s curve balls are what break people apart. How would your lover react to a death? How would they react to a hurricane? How would they react to failure? There is a lot to know about Lizzie and this year has been hard on her. But like a big Mack truck, she plows on with veracity. She is a power all on her own when she wants to be. After tonight though, I am not so sure she will be able to get up tomorrow.

  I am waiting for her to totally crack wide open. Some weekends she won’t leave the house because she is despondent about losing Conner. She wants ice cream and 80’s movies or she wants cuddle time and foot massages. On those days, we don’t say much. Some weekends, she flies high, almost manic, working on investment accounts at home, and being a super mom. There are times that she wants me to coddle her because she is paralyzed by her vulnerability.

  Conner’s death did this to her. When she moved into my apartment after his funeral, she began the hard core ups and downs. Sure, she has always been able to shift her mood quickly but something about her lately makes me feel like she isn’t in control anymore. I do have faith in her and know things will get better, smooth out in the future. We are happy together and we are eager to get married and expand our family. I am in love. Huh. I never thought I would say that and mean it.

  From the first moment Lizzie spoke to me, my life altered infinitely. I am not one to believe in soul mates but that day my eyes landed on her green eyes, red hair, and magnificent smile; she turned my whole universe upside down. She was my vacuum and I was sucked in. Lizzie has this carefree spirit that even strangers want to be around. I knew I did.

  When we first met, I played it cool and gave her my business card in the hopes that she would call me. I saw her at the bistro a few days later. Unfortunately, I was taking another woman out for lunch. I know. I was a bit of a man whore. Drew had matched me up with Claudia, the blond bombshell, who reminded me of the Texas women I was accustomed to. She was sexy by definition and I was interested. But then I saw Lizzie walk through the door to get her lunch. I watched her the whole time while listening to Claudia go on and on about where to buy the best cheese in Boston.

  Lizzie. Beautiful Lizzie fogged my head and made me want to salivate at her feet. I thought only of Lizzie when Claudia took me back to her place to have sex and I just couldn’t do it. Every time I started in on her, Lizzie’s harried face, hair flying every which way, and her timid smile flashed through my mind like a movie clip on repeat. I ran away from Claudia that night, begging off an early meeting. The next day was Sunday so I think she got the hint. From that day on, I waited for Lizzie.

  I went back to that damn bistro practically every day I was in the city. I had given up hope of ever seeing her again and kicked myself that I never got her number. I went to see her brother’s band play, but she was never there. I was too chicken shit to ask her brother about her. He looked so much like her that I think I developed a semi-bromance crush on the guy. He was just as charismatic as Lizzie.

  My next thought after not hearing from her was that maybe there was another man in her life and she was just being friendly the day we ate lunch together. I nearly jumped out of my skin the day she emailed me about tech software. I was in the middle of a merger meeting with seven other suits and couldn’t focus on a heartfelt email, so I kept it professional. I felt like an ass hat. The meeting lasted until eleven that night and I stayed up all night thinking of what I could say to get her to meet up with me again. The next morning, I wrote out five different emails and finally just sent one because I basically sucked ass at courting a woman through email.

  When Lizzie declared she loved the band Phish, I fell a little bit in love with her. I hurriedly got extra VIP tickets on top of the tickets I already had, just in case she wanted to sit down, and have a drink. I didn’t tell her. I just waited. Only a true Phish fan finds a way to go to their concerts. She didn’t disappoint. It was fucking awesome when she called. I know I sounded like an idiot on the phone but I didn’t care. I was going to spend the whole night with her.

  I had a hard time saying no to friends so I begrudgingly told Caroline and Drew they could come along. Caroline was a nice girl I had dated once but I never felt anything for her. Sure, we had a lot of great times, rolling around in the bedroom, and getting shitfaced on top quality whiskey but that day I would have given anything for h
er not to beg, call, or show up. Caroline obviously wanted me but she also wanted Drew. Tension was high and Lizzie didn’t deserve the mess I had made by agreeing to my friends inviting themselves.

  Drew was a whole different story that day because basically he was a bastard and wanted Lizzie for himself. As far as he knew, I would never be a married man. She was free game, he had told me that morning. So everyone went to that concert to spend time with someone they wanted…except Lizzie. She just wanted to see Phish again.

  Despite all of that, when I danced with my red headed fireball on the lawn, I wanted her. Lizzie made magic out of her body movement and every one, girls and guys alike, around us noticed and adored her enthusiasm. She talked to almost everyone in the crowd during intermission. People gravitated to her magnetism. She was a constant bolt of lightning. I had to have her in my life daily. She was who I had always been looking for and I didn’t even know it until that night.

  Later on at her place when we discussed sleeping arrangements, she protested against anything more than friendship. That stung just a little bit but it didn’t deter me from pursuing her anyway. Finally, Lizzie admitted to me that she had always wanted me but was too afraid to love again after the father of her baby went home to Ireland.

  Sometimes, I thank that man for leaving. It may be a despicable thing to think but if she ended up with Teagan, she would have never come into my world. Of course, I would never tell her that I was glad for her misfortunes. I would easily give away the fifty million dollars in my investment accounts before I hurt her in any way.

  THREE - NICK

  Lizzie wrapped up the set and bounced off the stage with the rest of the guys. She gasped at the crowd descending on her and looked a little panicked. I stayed planted to my stool and watched her get mauled by fans. This was her moment and I would congratulate her later in my own way.