Both of Her Page 8

  “He’s an old friend,” I say with a wave of my hand.

  “An old friend who placed you on top of your desk? A leaving you with your face all flush like you’ve just been thoroughly fucked kind of friend?”

  “I didn’t fuck him. God, Annie. I may have had my mind elsewhere these past few days, but give me some credit here.” Sliding down off of my desk, I straighten myself out the best I can.

  “I’m sorry,” she says contritely.

  “It’s ok. I would definitely think the same thing if I walked in on you with someone like that.”

  “Well, I can tell you’re not into sharing any information, so I’m going to take off. I only wanted to tell you that Heath Landon has called three times in the past hour. That man sure is persistent. I mean, I kept telling him you were in a meeting with Mr. Steel and you would call him back,” she huffs, handing me a piece of paper with his number on it. God, how I wanted this number in a bad way the other day, and now that I have it, staring back at me, I don’t want it anymore.

  NINE

  My god, what have I done? How could I have given into Camden so easily? A few days ago, my life was perfectly fine and now, well now, I’m slipping into a pile of quicksand full of despair and desperation. I agreed to scale back my life for him, come to a grinding halt. I’ve worked too hard for all of this. I love my life and now I’m walking blindfolded on a very thin tightrope.

  I immediately chastise myself even more than I already had been, when my hands pick up my phone, before setting it back down again; with this faceless new feeling of fear like I’ve never known before staring back at me. Heath, I have to call him. What do I say? Oh hey, by the way, I had a great time this past weekend, but I’m giving it all up for your partner. Would you like your anklet back?

  “Lucia.” I immediately jump at the sound of hearing my name, my other name. A name coming out of the very same man’s mouth who, just days before, had it all over my body. The same man who gave me pleasure like no man before him did. Except for one. His business partner.

  “Heath, how did you get in here?” I’m trying to pull my wits together, find myself. Even though I’m in my office, I’m not sure if I’m Luca or Lucia right now. With the way Heath is looking at me, it gives me the answer I need. He’s holding me in his gaze like he wants to spread me across my desk, whip out his glorious cock, and fuck me. No, I cannot let this happen. Even though every part of my body comes alive in his presence, craving nothing more than a release, if only from the tension my body holds.

  “I never left. I’ve been with Mitch and Leo this whole time, while you’ve been hiding out in here with Camden. Care to explain how you know my partner? Was he one of your many conquests? It’s quite ironic, don’t you think?” He slams the door behind him, stalking my way. In an instant, his features change from lust to anger.

  “You have no idea what you’re talking about,” I respond sarcastically.

  “Don’t I? Because watching you run away and lock yourself up in this office did not come from just seeing me. No, it came from seeing the both of us together. What the fuck are you hiding?”

  I retreat back into my chair, seeking safety. This isn’t the same sweet man from the weekend who worshipped me. This man speaks danger. My heart stutters and it becomes difficult to breathe, the air in the room turning ice cold.

  “I don’t owe you anything, Heath.”

  He comes closer to me. I try and observe his face, examining the death glare penetrating through me. Jesus, he looks like he wants to kill me. Suddenly, I am not so excited about this man the way I was earlier. No, he looks like a ravage animal waiting to fuck with his lunch. When I was with him, I thought he was the nicest and sweetest man I’d ever met, but obviously I can’t trust anything I think anymore. This whole situation is a twisted up game of “see Luca run” and “I need to get the hell out of here now”. Two Alpha males are in my professional world trying to dictate who I am.

  It is true that things can switch without any notice. I am living proof.

  “You need to leave or I’m calling security,” I demand.

  “You won’t call anyone or I’ll expose you for who you really are. Nothing but a god damned whore.” I’m horrified as he locks his arms around me, caging me in like a trapped animal, but beyond furious that he called me a whore.

  “I’m not a whore. You bastard!” I look up, meeting his harsh eyes.

  “No? Then what are you?” he questions.

  “I’m a business woman. A very good one.” My temper was quickly elevating.

  “Yes you are a very good one. The best Lucia. You suck cock like no one else.” His hand grabs ahold of my chin painfully hard. I cry out from the pain he is inflicting on me.

  “Camden has been researching over a year for a marketing firm for us. What I want to know is, why you? Why would he want a fraud like this company? And with you, a slut, for its marketing director?” He laughs.

  “Leave. I don’t need you or your business,” I say through gritted teeth. This is the first time in the last decade anyone has made me feel like a whore and I’m not stopping him. I’m letting him continue his verbal assault on me. I’m disgusted with myself. I want to go home and scrub my body raw, to erase Heath from my memory. This man is not the man I spent those wonderful moments with in Georgia. He is a gross, disgusting person, who gets his kicks by beating other people down. No wonder he couldn’t find a woman for the weekend. I smile on the inside. I don’t want him to know that I am finding this amusing in any way.

  “But you needed my cock, didn’t you? Perhaps you need it again.” Keeping his hold firmly on my face, he moves his other hand down to cup my center, fondling me through my clothes. His touch instantly taints the memories of my weekend with his filth, and then shame, as he moves his fingers up and down my folds, pushing my panties up inside of me. I feel sick.

  “I’m going to find out whatever it is you’re hiding and when I do, trust me, I’m going to destroy you.” With that, he lets me go, staring down at me with even more disgust than before.

  Fuck him. He isn’t any better than I am. I bend down and yank the chain off of my ankle. It’s difficult to break at first. I tug until it releases. As soon as I feel it break free, I clutch it in my hand, before heaving it at him, hitting him in the chest.

  “Fuck you. You lowlife son of a bitch, don’t you ever touch me again. Now get out.” I feel like I’m on repeat with these men, only this time I mean what I’m saying. I want this scum gone from my life. I need to rid my body and my mind of him. He bends at his waist, picking up the anklet, tossing it in the air with a cocky smirk on his face. He circles in the opposite direction of my door, dropping the bracelet in the garbage can on the side of my desk. The clink of the gold, along with all those stunning diamonds has me closing my eyes. No more words are exchanged as he leaves me trembling and wondering if both he and Camden are not the ones who are playing me. And if they are, what the hell do they want?

  ***

  “Twice in one week? Only this time I’m seeing your… What the hell happened?” Lola screeches. I skyped her the moment I walked through the door into my home. The minute Heath left, I called Mitch and Leo into my office, filling Leo in on everything. He made a few wise ass remarks about my escorting that had me laughing, until I told them both about Heath threatening me. The three of us agreed we do not need their business. However, we still need to tread lightly, even with Camden. I tried to explain to both of them I trust Camden; that this is not only my life, but theirs as well and I will not let it go to hell. They both have been faithful, loyal friends for years – I will not do anything to betray them. Then, I called Colin, giving him the night off after Leo demanded he was driving me home.

  And now, here I am, crying out of control at the mess my life has become.

  “Luca, what happened?” I drop my head with a heavy sigh, trying to regain my composure.

  “Lola, for the first time in years I feel like I don’t know who I am. Like a gh
ost has awakened inside of me. One I had no clue was even there. I’m tired, frustrated, scared, and helpless.”

  “Talk to me. What happened?”

  And I do. I fill her in on the day’s events. I even tell her all about Heath and I mean all of it. “Well, damn, Luca,” she mutters when I finish my story. After a pause, she continues, “Listen, the Luca I know would never let a man control her. You need to own this shit. Own yourself with both of these men. Camden is right about you and that ring. You know it as well as I do.

  “Now, I don’t know him at all, but I do know you and there is no way in hell you would give up anything for anyone if you didn’t trust them. So, you keep your mouth shut about Heath. You let Mitch and Leo deal with him. You know they can handle him. You take some time off of work for you, and I don’t mean time off like those weekend trips you take. I mean time off to get out and have some fun. If you have tons of great sex, great, call it an added bonus. But do something different, damn it. No contracts. No strings. Let loose and soar. Camden’s a pilot with his own plane. Go somewhere together. Your team can take care of Divider. Hell, as organized as you are the damn company could run itself.” Maybe she’s right. The thought of leaving all this behind even for a few days might be what I need.

  “Your right,” I say on a whim.

  “Repeat, please?” Lola croons in a poorly fake English accent, making me smile rather easily.

  “You heard me.”

  “Yeah, what the fuck ever. Seriously though, Luca. Your nice little tidy life is on one of those roller coasters that feels like it will never end, but so what. Fuck ‘em, girl. And I don’t mean literally. Take that cold iron heart of yours and make it the hot melting point of your body. Open the damn thing up and let yourself be suffocated with other things besides jewelry and designer dresses and shoes.” Her head is bobbing up and down as if she has all the answers in the world, and in this moment, she does. She has my answers.

  I cannot promise her I will be able to take my mind off of the things I’m so used to receiving. I can however try. That’s what I do after I disconnect my session with her. I will try. I just pray to god my gut is steering me right, because if Camden is out to destroy me like my intuition is telling me Heath is, I may never recover. I only hope that during these few days I take off the guys can figure out what exactly Heath has up his sleeve, while playing nice with their charismatic wit and charm. The man is way too smart for his own good. Any slip up and he will be onto them, but I trust them to be able to fix this.

  I need to stop thinking about the cluster that is Heath and focus on Camden and what he expects out of me, except, nothing will feel right again until I know why Heath is so dead set on destroying me.

  ***

  “Oh, Annie. What would I ever do without you? I owe you big.” I’m not even the slightest bit embarrassed that I called her in a pinch about what to make for dinner tonight. Thank god Annie is full of ideas when it comes to cooking, unlike me.

  “Not a problem, but could you tell me why Mitch and Leo are huddled in the boardroom like two dumb ass wanna-be football players?” I look down at my phone, resting on my counter, just to make sure it really is Annie I’m talking to. She sounds distraught. My dear friend feels left out.

  “I’m sure they are going over all the contracts, on top of taking over my schedule for the rest of the week, Annie. Or who knows with those two. Maybe they really are strategically planning out their fantasy football thing-a-ma-jig they do,” I tell her, trying to make her laugh or at least smile.

  “Whatever you say, Luca It’s your company.”

  Her abruptness stops me mid-step in my kitchen. “I’m sorry, Annie. What is it you would like to know?” Annie is one of my best friends. I understand completely where she is coming from. I would feel the same way as she does, but she doesn’t have to act like a bitch about it.

  “You can fill me in when you return. Enjoy your pizza.” She hangs up before I can say anything else.

  I feel so guilty. I should explain everything to her. I just don’t want to do it over the damn phone and she was so abrupt in leaving yesterday. I sigh, bringing down the second wine glass I was reaching for. My thoughts are trained on Camden and the fact that he should be here within the hour. My stomach grumbles when I think of the Chicago style pizzeria right up the street. Perfect for a night in.

  I look down at the jeans I have on, my APO custom designed fit dark wash. The most comfortable pair of jeans I own. Ones I very rarely wear. In fact, I have dozens of pairs of jeans I never wear. Dozens of old sweatshirts too, just like the NYU one I have on now. It’s the very first one I bought, the same one I had on when I met Camden.

  “Oh shit.” I scramble around the island in my kitchen toward my bedroom. I don’t want to wear this. What if he remembers? I cease halfway to my room when the doorbell rings. My head swinging back and forth, trying to decide if I should make a run for it to change or answer the door. When it rings again, I have no choice but to run to the door. When I open it, I’m winded from the small run, plus the anxiety that creeps its way back into my mind – the same anxiety I had the night before. I had tossed and turned from a restless night’s sleep, picking at my fingernails which I had to go and have redone earlier in the day. All of that worry squanders away when I see the man standing at my door, holding a small bouquet of tiny white and pink roses.

  “Luca.” Camden graciously looks me up and down, his gaze giving away his underlying sexual goals. He wants me…bad. For a moment, I feel that anticipation I had years ago in the Waldorf Astoria. I remember the way he made me feel and man, I want that again. He’s in his pilot outfit and fuck me, have I been flown to heaven, because my god, he is hot. I don’t know what happened to me in that conference room when I decided there wasn’t anything between us. May it was his admission to finding me. Maybe it’s the fact that I am allowing myself to slowly drink him in. Whatever happened between then and now, there isn’t a doubt in my mind that I want this man. Need this man. Ache for this man. Tonight I’m not only Lucia and I am not only Luca. Tonight, I’m both of her, and for once, I am ready for both sides to meet. Just for this man.

  TEN

  “You’ve never had deep crust pizza before?” I grip for anything to say as my willpower to not jump across the table and straddle him is barely hanging on by a thread.

  “Never. It was very good, and this wine is great.” Well that’s a lie. The part about the wine, I mean. He’s not a wine drinker. I knew that. God I’m a fool.

  “Did you ever think about me?” he asks.

  “Wh… what? Of course I thought about you. Didn’t we establish that yesterday?” I respond, holding up my ring playfully.

  He keeps watching me, studying me like I’m a problem he’s trying to solve. Suddenly, very uncomfortable, I move out of my chair with the almost empty pizza box, tossing it onto the counter. I take the few steps to the fridge where I know there is a few Heineken’s from Leo still lingering deep in the back. I’m sure Camden would prefer a beer over the wine.

  “Don’t.” The single word has me pausing. His hot breath is suddenly on the back of my neck. His hand wisps to the side and shuts the refrigerator door. He slides the bottle of beer out of my hand, setting it on the counter before both of his arms come gently, but firmly around my middle, outlining across my stomach. I’ve never relaxed into a man as much as I melt into him, forming myself up against the plains of his powerfully built frame.

  “Do you know the things I want to do to you right now, Luca?”

  I inhale sharply. “Tell me.” My eyelids struggle to stay open. I’m in a trance from his simple touch.

  “I want to press my lips up against your cheek, just to feel your skin. I want to hold you close, tracing the curve of your jaw with my tongue all the way to your delicate neck. I’ll tell you between every lick, every suck, and every taste how much just looking at your beauty turns me on. You don’t even have to touch me and I already want to be buried so deep inside you that
you will never want anyone else but me. Tell me you want me. One simple word and I’ll take you to your bedroom and love you until the sun comes up, Luca.”

  Jesus God. No one has ever spoken to me like that before. Every man I’ve ever been with has fucked me because, theoretically in one way or another, he was paying for it. But not Camden. Not even when we were together before. Did he fuck me? Yes. Did he worship me, all weekend long? Did he end up paying me somehow? Yes again. But not until later, when our time together was up. He didn’t have to give me anything more than he already had at that point. Am I crazy for thinking someone could actually love me? And I don’t mean falling in love with me. I mean, wanting to be with me because they want to. Because they desire me, for me, not for what they gave me and I give to them in return.

  “Yes, Camden, I want you.”

  “Where’s the bedroom?” Slipping one arm under my knee and the other firmly under my back, he carries me down the long hallway toward my room. The soft dim of the light gives off just enough for me to see his eyes, a blueish black, hard and full of passion.

  “Stay.” His deep voice rumbles, demanding when he places me down on top of my bed. The rich softness of the deep rose blanket is comforting as I run my nervous hands across the top. Camden looks upon me as if I’m a gift.

  “You are beautiful, and yet that doesn’t feel like an adequate enough word for you, Luca.” he moans, trailing a finger down my cheek until he’s cupping the side of my face. I hear the button pop open on my jeans. The zipper going down. Then the touch of his long fingers sliding across the top of my pubic bone. I swallow, as his hand leaves my cheek.

  “What?” I ask, unsure what I’m asking for.

  “Shh, no talking. Let me show you. Feel, remember?” He taps my rear, indicating for me to lift. I do and my jeans and lace panties are yanked off, tossed over his shoulder. One leg is drawn up toward his face, his hands skimming up and down.